The countdown (to the end of grad school) is ON!!!

Seriously, guys. I'm sorry I have been so absent so far this year. I am less than FIVE DAYS from completing my final two classes for graduate school and then I will have my MEd!!!!!! And these classes that I am in right now? They are the dooziest of doozies (of classes) that I have taken yet. But then what do I expect, right?

Thought I would share with you yet another Powtoons creation that I put together and submitted as a part of my capstone project for my Directed Practicum project. I was allowed to propose anything I wanted and so I decided to put together a "starter package" (for all intents and purposes) for a beginning secondary art education teacher. There are (4) components of it including the powtoon (see below) that took me a ridiculous amount of time to create. The other parts are a lesson planning template (the one that I am always hocking to you all that uses inquiry-based learning), an idea for studio art classroom design (if money were no object or anything - see pics below the powtoon created with Interior Design App on iPad) and a comprehensive list of suggested supplies (available upon request - just leave me a comment and let me know how to get it to you OR email me!)

Anyway, here's the powtoon that I call "State of the {ART} Education" (that's what I called my who project) and below are the images of the interior design for my "dream" art education classroom that go along with the notion of what I believe to be "State of the {ART] Education."

 



Here are some of the shots of the classroom design...

In my original presentation of the classroom design, there were "walking" views of each space shown in the aerial views of the total space. It was a LOT OF WORK but kind of fun and I really enjoyed how simple the interior design app was for iPad to use. It was very much "what you see is what you get" in its functionality and capability and also saved me quite a bit of moo-lah seeing as how it wasn't the hundreds of dollars that a CAD program like that would have been had it not been a (more expensive) app the way it is ($10.99 is what I think it was but it was worth every single penny).

Anyone, I am in the throes of my last (and most gauntlet-like) graduate assignment which is for me to write 18 weeks of curriculum. I have a lot of it done but that's not nearly enough because in addition to all that I still have left of that? I have a bunch of other items that need to also be attended to in order to wrap up both of my courses. I've come this far, right? When all is said and done I might start calling myself the "Little Engine that could." *wink*

See you next time when I have finished it all and I have (FINALLY) have my masters degree!!!

Everybody needs a little time away... I heard her say...

Recognize the title of this posting? Are you a Chicago and/or Peter Cetera fan?

If you hadn't noticed, I have been keeping to a posting schedule of Monday-Friday since the school year started for me. My only reason for not posting on the weekends is that I am usually doing other stuff that is usually graduate school stuff but more recently has been photography work. I had a wedding last weekend, I have another wedding next weekend, and I had a family portrait session that was supposed to be this weekend but will likely be next weekend the day after I shoot the wedding.

The classic "What's in my bag" shot of all of my gear ready to go for a full-day of wedding shooting.

A screenshot of the culling process of some of the straight-outta-the-camera shots I captured from last week's wedding.

Yesterday I was doing my typical morning commute while catching up with my mom (we are both early risers) and we were counting our many blessings even despite the sadness brought within recent weeks of my grandfather (on my mom's side) going to be with the Lord last week and an aunt (on my dad's side) who is expected to pass on at any time now. 

Despite the fact that I haven't mentioned it, all of the aforementioned (and plenty more I will likely never mention) has me feeling wicked ragged these days. (I did some of my undergrad studies in New England so using 'wicked' in place of 'very' makes so much better sense sometimes.)

Something I learned long long ago is that I am not superwoman and I cannot do it all nor shall I try. Still, I am bad at remembering things and that's certainly one thing that I forget all too often. And then I get to a point in my life where I realize I have been working eight days a week with no end in sight and only because I made it that way. Pretty much I have only myself to blame for doing it like this and being this way. 

I am not going to say that I won't be posting next Monday or the rest of the week but I will forewarn you to not be surprised if that ends up happening anyway. Yesterday I joined three of my best girls for a bit of Happy Hour (I don't drink so I ate chocolate cake and a cup of soup - in that order) and it was so awesome. We call ourselves "The Unicorn Club" and it was so awesome to be able to get together with them outside of working hours. They do it all the time without me but they are always inviting me and for the first time yesterday I ditched out (for a little while) on mommy and wifey life and IT. WAS. AWESOME.

One of the other gals of "The Unicorn Club" got this for me and the rest of the unicorns. BEST. KEYCHAIN. EVER!!!!

Though I am kind of disappointed that the family portrait session originally scheduled this weekend got bumped to next weekend (or maybe the one after that), I am kind of excited at the fact that I will spend this weekend doing things other than what I have been doing with all of the different types of working I do. I really need a weekend to play hooky (if you will) and do the following...

Kick off the weekend with a little bit of "Friday Night Lights" action at my school's last home game of the year/season

Go to church but NOT to be running the projector (as pictured here) and rather sit in my favorite pew for some praise, worship, and wisdom of the sermons and messages from the amazing pastors and elders.

Prepping my home sweet home to be more of an art studio sweet art studio for my family!!! I have a very small studio for my own personal use but it was unanimously decided that it needed to be bigger so that all of us could create TOGETHER.

I am praying that taking some time for respite will help to inspire me and invigorate me so that when I return to work next week to wrap up this first marking period (all of my grades are due mid-week!!) I can do more and better of what I love: be a working and teaching visual artist, be a wife and mother, and be an active blogger.

Have a great weekend! Hope you will spend it participating in some respite as well.

It's here!!! The Dream. Pray. Create. Lesson Planning Template!!!

It's here!!! It's here it's here it's HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRE!!!!

As I have said before, this year I decided to be a first year/sixth year teacher and it has absolutely transformed everything about my classroom. If you have already forgotten what I am referring to I will tell you again that it has all come from my implementation to do inquiry-based teaching with a teaching model I designed and discussed HERE.

Approaching teaching and learning in this way has done the following in my classroom: renewed me with fresh inspiration, empowered and encouraged my students to be more autonomous and personally accountable in their creative efforts, and given both me and my students much needed structure in order to have a working studio art classroom that is more like a "well-oiled" machine than I ever might have dreamed it could be.

I am calling this teaching model "The DreamPrayCreate Teaching method because I can't think of any other way to call it. *shrug* (Seriously.) Calling it "A Framework for teaching Visual Arts Education + The Creative Process" makes it sound so dry and official and while it has become a very official thing for me to use that certainly does provide an amazing framework for Visual Arts Education it jus seems like it could be called something a lot more colorful, imaginative, and inventive (in what it suggests it does for teaching/learning.

The template itself is not necessarily six pages (as seen below in the snapshot of the multi-page view in Microsoft Word) but when I typed it all out for the Our Common Threads | Intro to Printmaking lesson idea, it ended up being longer than the 3-4 pages it started out with in it's blank state.

I have (for you to download and use!!) both the BLANK version of this lesson planning template as well as a completely useable and fully articulated lesson plan for the Our Common Threads | Intro to Printmaking project. Both versions are being stored online in the Google docs folder I set up to be able to share documents with you all...

• DreamPrayCreate Lesson Planning template worksheet in word document (the most recent/up-to-date version of word docs - (3) pages - as well as in PDF format
• DreamPrayCreate sample lesson of Our Common Threads | Intro to Printmaking in PDF format (6 pages) and HERE it is in word document as well

Regarding the visual formatting of the above documents, the word version of the Lesson Planning template worksheet should be downloaded and not just modified in Google docs because it is definitely off in how it is viewed via the Google docs web-based platform. The correct visual formatting is viewable only via the PDF formats for both the lesson planning worksheet AND the sample lesson.

I invite and welcome you to use both of them AND share them with others in an effort to (perhaps?) inspire, invigorate, and reshape the teaching and learning that happens in your art classrooms. Still though? I feel like this could work just as well for any other type of content-area as well so share it with your non-art education colleagues! What I have designed and created is something that definitely is indicated to be for a classroom/school of Christian faith, the section that indicates the connection to a Christian worldview could just as well be thought of us being a Character trait connection so that the teaching of Visual Art is a vessel for learning principles and values like integrity, perseverance, selflessness, etc.

As for me providing lesson ideas in the future in this format? I am undecided. This year is a curriculum review year for me at my school and while writing up everything in this lesson planning document for each of my lesson ideas would certainly align with the assessing and revamping of my curriculum area, well... I have a lot more to do for this process other than writing lesson plans (micro-level type planning) and I have to focus on the big picture and the long-term/far reaching goals of the visual arts program at my school. While I would like to say I am "that good" and I can both stand a little bit in one place while also making leaps and bounds in every direction, I am realistic in knowing that I cannot do it. Still, it doesn't mean that there might be some lessons/lesson notes that I won't sometimes present in this format. I mean, now that I have it it is certainly a lot easier for me to implement/use/share with you all so perhaps I need to just TRUST in the Lord that He will steer me and provide for me so that I am using it - especially if it is helpful for you all.

I see what I am doing as a little bit of collaboratively planning with you all and I am happy to do it as long as the Lord Almighty provides a way for me to do so. Let me know how you like this lesson planning template and/or how you think it could be modified to be more useful! I know I'm not perfect and so I am always open to constructive feedback of how to make what I'm doing better.

An armature for Visual Arts curriculum and instruction

While it's not ready yet, I just wanted to give you all a heads up of a very special something to come!

This year (at my school) it is curriculum review year for my content area and this is really informing my planning and teaching decisions that have largely contributed to my inspiration and motivation to create the inquiry-based teaching and learning method I have been using with my classes. Because I am also doing graduate studies in the Masters of Arts in Teaching program, I am learning the importance of having a good solid armature for my instruction and curriculum and really making an effort to plan ahead and NOT rely solely on teaching on the fly. I mean, definitely the ability of teaching on your feet and being able to go with the flow is important but ultimately? I know (for me as a teacher) I am much more effective in the classroom when I have really thought about what I am going to do before I do it.

All of that being sad? The above image is a sneak peek of what will be unveiled tomorrow so come back and see me then! I will have not only a little bit of an explanation behind the inspiration behind it but I will also have an empty/blank one for you to use (that can be downloaded and/or shared collaboratively) as well as one that is fully articulated and aligns with a lesson idea I did just this year with my 2D classes! This means that you will have my lesson notes for one of my project ideas!! See you tomorrow!!

Selfish prayers & Abundant blessings

Last Thursday, an amazingly unexpected act of mercy, peace, and grace happened that made my school look like this...

The hallways cleared out in addition to nearly every classroom. Why? Because something happened that broke the plumbing and left the school without running water. Per the county, when something like this happens, the school has no choice but to dismiss everyone from the campus.

This major event happened right after weekly assembly (where the whole student body gathers to be updated on upcoming doings and happenings) and I was covering lunch duty for a colleague of mine who so graciously covered my lunch duty the day before. The dining hall was buzzing with excited whispers that we might be getting ready to be dismissed early. (This event has occurred frequently enough in the past that when the plumbing breaks, we all know that we will get a break too!)

Some of my students had just asked me if they could get special permission to walk out to the soccer fields to use the port-a-potties...

And another group of students were desperate to try and weasel the REAL word from me about whether or not we were going to be dismissed or not. Truth be told, I am usually the first to know a lot of things (because I hear so much student conversation in the art rooms) but when it comes to things that most faculty might know? I am usually out of the loop! As the students insisted that I (somehow) knew something and wasn't telling them I INSISTED that we pray about it and I led the students in possibly the most self-centered prayer ever that outright asked that school be cancelled and as soon as humanly possible. Why? Because as life has happened (not just for me) but also some of my students, things have been very trying, challenging, and an unexpected opportunity for respite is a very welcome thing.

To make an already long story even longer, school was dismissed and here I sit all by my lonesome trying to not only line up blog postings for (what is now) this week but also catch up on graduate school work and prepare for other such things not related to school and work.

Lately I have come to the real truth that I absolutely cannot do it all. Things of life are breaking me at the knees so I can't even kneel to pray for mercy and I am instead having to lay myself out prostrate in submission (and just as much shame) that I can't do it all and I shouldn't make it out like I can.

Just before dismissal one of very good friends from work sent me the (see left image) text message. Normally I would jump at the opportunity to do something like what she suggested but lately? I can't. It's not even possible for me to look at all of it and even endeavor to imagine that I can do it by myself.

And? That's the key right there. I can't do it. (I can't do it!) BUT, I WILL DO IT under the mercy of the Lord Jesus Christ. I CAN and I WILL do it not by myself but with Christ's blessing, provisions, wisdom, preservation, and redeeming grace.

Someday I am going to look back on this particular time in my life and understand what it was all worth. In the midst of it though, it IS true what they say about being in the trees. I totally cannot see the forest and I feel lost on any given day. However, on those days and in those moments when I really don't want to feel lost anymore, I remember that I can always call out to be lifted up by Christ and no matter how selfish my prayers are, He will even answer those.

Teaching Reading in a Visual Art classroom

Right now I am taking a graduate class called "Reading in the Content Area." Some of you all might be familiar with it since it is one the standard courses required of nearly every degree program for an educator to become fully certified to teach. It's also the one course that I have been able to discover is the most detested of all candidate teachers with the exception of those teachers who are answering the calling to teach Reading.

Before this class I was totally unwilling to call believe in the notion that "Every teacher is a Reading teacher." My thoughts were that if I wanted to be a Reading teacher than I wouldn't be in Visual Arts in the first place. On top of all of this is the fact that I am legitimately dyslexic when it comes to reading so that makes me life Reading even less!

Well, I gotta say that I am two weeks from completing this "Reading in the Content Area" course and I have officially jumped ship to stand corrected and agree with the notion that, "Yes. I AM a Reading teacher and every other teacher of subjects other than Reading can be, too!"  Had it not been for this class I wouldn't have known how important literacy is, how threatened it currently is, and how much literacy affects overall school performance - including the arts!

The above picture is one I took during the graphic design class while the students were working hard on figuring out some serious design challenges and while I could have just given them a tutorial to figure things out the way I always have in the past, I have changed things up majorly this year! Just like in all of my other classes, I am doing things by way of inquiry based learning/teaching.

Yes, I help to steer the ship that is my classroom but I am treating my classroom more like a ship that is a huge sailboat rather than a speedboat with a big motor. My goal is to help the students discover where and how the wind blows and then use it to propel them forward rather than letting themselves get lazy and just rip the motor cord and plow through all of the waves.

Things I am not

Something you might not know: While I share my regular goings-on of my art education adventures, I concurrently have been trying and complete my graduate studies program for a masters of arts in teaching (in a full-time capacity) while also investing myself trying to be a true Proverbs 31 type of woman.

Does all of this seem impossible? I'll go ahead and give you the right answer to that question and confirm for you that YES. It is impossible.

Now, while I would like to think of myself as a bit of a modern-day superwoman, I am constantly reminded that I am not. And you know what? I am FINE with this. I am just fine with it!!! Just the same, it never stops me from trying to be a modern-day superwoman in any given moment. The problem with that is most of the time I can sort of come close to feeling like I'm really doing it all and then I get all high up on myself and forget what the real truth is. And then I am smacked upside the back of my head with the reality or (even worse but nearly so often as probably I should) I find myself wedged in between the biggest rock and the hardest place you could ever imagine.

Superman himself had his kryptonite and as it turns out, I do too. And that is? It's reading.

If you have only just become acquainted with me/this blog then you might not know that I am dyslexic when it comes to reading. As dyslexia exists for me, it affects my reading fluency. This means that while I might be able to speak and write like I am not dyslexic (although sometimes you can tell when I am writing), I am very VERY challenged if you ever ask me to read most things. I have an incredibly difficult time pick words up off a page in order to even be able to understand what they mean. When a normal person might be able to just look at words on a page and have a pretty solid understanding (almost immediately) of what they say, I don't have that "luxury" (as I like to think of it). The reason being? Well, this is the process I sometimes have to go through to even get to the point of being able to start figuring out the meaning of what I read...

1. See the words on a page but see them as thin black stripes on a white background (especially if the typeface is stylized with serifs)
2. Adjust my eyes/focus/vision by telling my brain to tell my eyes that what I am seeing IS a string of words and try to recognize them as such
3. Finally see the words/sentences/paragraphs as they were intended to be seen by the author/publisher because I am concentrating hard to see them as such
4. Start to separate each of the elements on the page to be able to decode what they mean so I can attempt to connect them to each other and I can start to understand meaning of what is being presented
5. Start to have my eyes/focus/vision revert to seeing everything written as thin black stripes on a white background because I am not concentrating on seeing them as words/sentences/paragraphs anymore and then have to (pretty much) start from step #1 again

I have to go through this every time I read. The only way I can avoid it is if the following conditions are able to be met:

• I can adjust the contrast of the printed words and the background so that they are sepia toned or even white print on black background
• I can change the font so that it is a sans serif font and also change the size of the font
• I can adjust the spacing between the lines of text
• The book is available in audio version (meaning: book on tape) that doesn't take a ridiculous amount of time for me to listen to for the purposes of me reading it. This means, if I only need to read/listen to a passage from a written piece, it is difficult for me to do this since I have to comb through the poorly organized audio version of it to even find the right passage

To say that I have major issues with reading would be putting it offensively mildly. To say that reading is not an enjoyable experience for me would be a ridiculous understatement.  Here's the thing though: I don't really hate reading so much as I hate the act of it. And why would I feel anything but that? I mean, especially when you consider what I have to go through in order to actual read.

And where am I going with all of this? Well... how about this because I do much better with expressing myself visually...

Isaiah 9:1-7

I took the above on Saturday evening when I was out with my husband and our daughter. Our area had just been hit by a derecho and it knocked out our power which meant that I had to stop struggling through my grad work and (if we wanted to eat dinner) we had to go out for dinner because we didn't have a way to make it at home - our stove is electric and we didn't want to have to go into the refrigerator/freezer in order to not lose all of our food.

We ended up in a local neighborhood trying to go to a restaurant that ended up having at least an hour's waiting list (everyone else had the same idea as us!) and then leaving that restaurant to go some place we never heard of that did have good food but had an 86 list that got longer and longer as the night wore on so much that by the time we were seated, they were out of a ton of things that should have been available as their menu promised. You know what though? I was not upset about what I couldn't have. Why? Because I had already gotten what I REALLY wanted to begin with which was a legitimate reason that made it impossible for me to not do any grad work.

Prior to all of this - and I mean earlier that day and extending back into two weeks before then - I had started this (what I know call horrid) project that required me to read and evaluate textbooks for my current course - Reading in the Content Area. My progress with this class has incredibly slow (at best) and largely because of all of the reading that is required of me in order to do any of the assignments. As it stands? I am almost two weeks behind on my coursework. I might even be close to being able to finish with a C in the course if I am lucky. Before this class I had a B and low A average. Welcome to my whole entire academic career of struggling and working myself to the bone only to churn out average grades. Welcome to me feeling like nothing I ever do will be good enough.

But here's the thing: Amidst all of this, the Lord has been faithful to me and reminding me of the fact that I am not the failure I might feel like in all of the moments of FAILure that I feel like I have been enduring. His reminders have come in all different ways too

• They have come by way of the refrigerator door gallery, they have come by way of two distant friends who have reached out to me and affirmed me when I have needed it most of the things I AM good at
• They have come by way of my students telling me that I should be a motivational speaker and that they are learning A LOT from me already and we aren't even a month into school
• They have come by way of the parents of the students I teach telling me that I am a blessing to be a part of their students' learning experiences and their student artist was SO excited to be able to finally be in my class OR be in my class again
• They have come every time my sweet daughter has looked at me and said, "I love you, Mama! I love you bigger than the sky and faster than the buzzoogle guy!" (Don't ask me what the buzzoogle guy is - I have no clue)
• They have come with me just sitting around and looking at the life I do have, the things that are fully present in my life, and taking it all in and realizing that I am not here because I have failed but rather because the Lord has blessed me and kept me in a place of providence, comfort, and safety

Two nights ago when I was out with my family for an impromptu meal that we could afford to partake in, I saw that picture of the sky in front of me and I was awestruck and reminded of what the rainbow means as per scripture. Did you notice that the entire rainbow spectrum is in the picture? Seriously. Look again...

Yes. The sky is pretty with all of that texture and the contrast of the lights and darks are magnificent to behold but you know what I see more than all of that? I see all of the colors of the rainbow within the frame of that image. And why is that important? Well, because it is just one more way that the Lord is reminding me of His goodness, faithfulness, and mercy. It's one more piece of evidence that He will NEVER forsake me or leave me no matter what. And while I cannot seem to read all of my ridiculous texts in order to complete any of my grad work? I certainly can read His promises in His word and I never have any issue understanding what it says OR what it means.

The battle | Graduate school with learning disabilities

It's been months that I have been randomly and quietly alluding to the fact that I struggle with learning disabilities. I have really REALLY wanted to share things of this a little more openly but I have been waiting to do this specifically because I wanted to provide you with a whole picture of what I have been having to deal with vs. just an much inferior snapshot of a very complicated "big picture."

TRUTH

I have struggled with two major learning disabilities for probably all of my life. However, it wasn't until just this year (specifically this summer) that I was finally able to put some names to the obvious struggles and call them what they are: ADHD and a Reading fluency disability [Some call this dyslexia but per current standards and practices of educational psychology, the correct term is reading disability with the identification of how the reading is affected.]

I am honestly not ashamed to share the fact that I have learning disabilities with you all. Why? Because for as much as it has hindered me during times in my life - specifically, from ever being able to be more than a solid B sprinkled with C student in middle school through high school - having the specific learning disabilities I now know I have has made me the person I am so strongly comfortable being...

source

From my earliest years I have ALWAYS been the most imaginative and "visionary" (if you will) individual among my peers. My naturally creative nature has lent itself to me having accomplishments to my name that others constantly remind me are truly exceptional and worthy of admiration and awe. (I don't want to go into those now though because that's not the point so I guess trust me or not on this.) As a result of knowing life as being constantly and consistently challenging (even though I didn't know why it was like this), I am an individual who is not easily discouraged and who doesn't know anything but deeply rooted perseverance and will power. Some people could also call this being stubborn but I call it not being easily shaken or stirred for anyone or anything. I mean, I do have my moments of feeling down and out but they are few and far in between and I don't stay in them for all too long because my instinct of resilience always kicks in before I shed too many tears. And as it happens, all of the aforementioned things have derived mostly from the fact that I have the disabilities I have (but never knew for sure).

I am convinced at this point in my life that the hand I have been dealt is solely because of intelligent design and the designer responsible for all of it is the amazingly sovereign Lord God Almighty. I understand the challenges I have been given as things meant to strengthen and preserve me rather than break me down and  reduce me to nothing. For me it's all a matter of CHOICE in the perspective I can take and the choice I constantly make is one that is focused more on what I have over what I don't have because for as much as being doubly learning disabled has taken from me, what it has given back has been beyond measure MORE than what I could ever imagine asking for. This is because I fall into the category of being an individual who is twice exceptional. Basically, I have specific and special talents and gifts despite the fact that I also have learning disabilities.  And you know what? This is not something that is particularly out of the ordinary. As it happens, history is chock full of folks who are also considered to be twice exceptional...

source

This past weekend I had to spend the majority of it holed away doing a serious amount of graduate school work because that's how it goes for me. I work slowly and am constantly up against deadlines and typically score lower than what my aptitude suggests I should despite the fact that I try really REALLY hard on every bit of work I do whether it's a quick and "easy" assignment or a more intense and long term investment of my time and effort. No matter how it goes it's always that most all things academically oriented just challenge me. I would accept nothing less than frustration about this but at this point in my life I am beyond that and I have been able to harness my creative to be inventive and resourceful in order to not just my learning disabilities dictate how much success I have or not.

Today is the first day of teaching for me - my 6th of my total teaching career and my 4th of teaching what I am and where I am. Since receiving my official diagnoses from all of my diagnostics, I have actively been sharing this about myself with many of my students (and their parents) in the most open and honest way. Last Friday I had a full day of meetings scheduled in order to help me and my colleagues to help each of the exceptional students we will have in our classes in the best ways we can. EVERY TIME I shared the fact that I, too, have learning disabilities in during any of the meetings, I cannot tell you the immediate sense of connection the student of the meeting would make with me when our eyes would meet and they would smile only to have me return the same knowing smile. EVERY TIME I shared my struggles as well as the solutions and successes I have found despite everything, the parents would breathe their own sighs of relief that the battles they have been working so hard to help their kids to fight were far from being called over and could (no doubt) be called over in terms of failure vs. great triumph and success.

Yes - it's possible for me to treat my learning disabilities as the end of me and the life I wish I could have but you know what? I much prefer accepting them as an integral and ESSENTIAL part of me that works in partnership with the unique gifts and talents I absolutely know I have and, in turn, springboards each and every one of those things so that the success I am poised to find at any given opportunity is something that is absolutely within my reach even though it's not that way for others.

Decompressing from decompression

Hello!

My brief and very necessary interlude (as mentioned here) is gradually coming to a close and I'm hoping to reinstate my blogging-legs within the week. Thanks for bearing with me and keeping the blog hits coming despite my lack of posting anything new.

While this is not a promise, some things I am considering sharing include the following:

• Thoughts/overview of my graduate summer studies and/or the distance learning experience in general
• The big word and conclusion of my learning disabilities issues (including the testing process, what it revealed, and how I am dealing with it)
• The whole business of me finally plunging into the world and wonders of iPad amazingness including some of the apps (for art and not) that I like and don't like
• Discovery and review of the Sensu stylus and digital paintbrush
• Thoughts/review of the book Imagine by Jonah Lehrer and how it has utterly transformed my approach to teaching art and the creative process
• My continuing adventures of giving handmade 
• Discipleship as it applies to fostering talent within the art world and providing individualize mentoring to fledgling artists
• And, of course, some of my planning process and supplies ordering for the upcoming school year

Now, let me just fully acknowledge my own flakiness that (easily) the aforementioned could hardly come close to any type of fruition. I mean, I'm sitting here (mostly) rested and reasonably inspired from an impromptu family vacation that took me out of the country.  The "everyday" of a whole house needing to be cleaned, massive amounts of laundry needing to be done, groceries needing to be bought, and a preschool child underfoot all while I am still doing graduate studies is completely and totally a reality as well. Still, I believe in thinking big and trying to accomplish as much of that is possible and I know if I just open my mind and heart, step aside, and let the Lord know my deepest desires and aspirations, He could very easily accomplish not only the aforementioned (with me as His vessel) but also much more than that. Truly, that's why I am here blogging/sharing to begin with.

All of that being said? I am still in my pajamas and my child is fussing at me to help her make a pretend picnic in her playroom. My goals for today include attending to that, getting to the grocery store (so my family has something to eat at all) and hopefully making it to the Apple store to pick up my new iPad. So, this is it for now. Just wanted to say "hey" I haven't completely disappeared and hope you are well. 

Coming to you L-I-V-E!!

Yesterday I packed my bags and jumped in the car to head to my first ever intensive week-long study course for my graduate program...

There are my bags with my study Bible topping the whole pile off. I cannot do this without THAT.

The drive was reasonable from the DC area where I live and it was also very pretty as I opted to take the most scenic routes available in order to work my way down to central VA where Liberty University is located. (That's where I am doing my studies. Not sure if I have mentioned that before.)

Before I arrived at my hotel, I made sure to pit stop at Target in an effort to pick up some things that would help make my room for a week more like home. I picked up snacks, lots of Dr. Pepper (so shameful that this was on my list of must-haves!), a single pretty bowl to eat out of, and a set of real silverware to eat with. My rationale was that I would already feel pretty displaced and out of sorts so if I did small things (like having real flatware and stuff at least to eat with) I wouldn't feel quite so far from home where I would much rather be.

I arrived and made really good time, checked in, set up my space, and got right to work as I still had to complete (and submit electronically) one mandatory item and then tie up lose ends for two other items (that worked in tandem) that would be submitted today and later this week.

Here is a view from the door of the place I will call home this week.

My hotel room for the week is probably the best that of what I could have gotten for the week. I thought very intently about what would be the best possible set up for me (knowing my work habits and specifically my diagnosed learning challenges) and intentionally sought out a living space that would separate the work area from the sleeping area. I was so happy to find a place that offered what you see above! What is not pictured is a very modest food storage/prep area with a sink, refrigerator, and microwave. Pair that with what you see above and you have a really cool little efficiency type studio apartment space that is a little more home-y and a little less hotel-y. 

I am so delighted to report that I was able to make a lot of progress with the immense amount of work that I have had to do for this class and though I was up until a little beyond 1am last night, I got everything taken care by what I know was the pure grace, endurance, and strength of my Lord God. 

Snapped this shot at a little before midnight when I still had a couple of hours to go.

I was also able to do some FaceTime with my husband and daughter and that alone motivated me and helped me to feel a little less far from home than what I actually am. I am looking forward to using that to its fullest extent for the entire time I am here doing my studies because I know it will help offset my homesickness that kicked in yesterday when I finally got here.

And right now? Well, I'm actually sitting in my class waiting for it to start. :)

The people so far seem really nice and I am looking forward to finally be able to make some (literal) connections with people versus having them be strictly virtual as this course has been predominantly online for me thus far.

Will continue to try and update with what I learn this week! Happy Monday.

All play and no work makes me a grad school dropout

For as much as I want to keep painting and have updates for you all about that, I also have to actually do all of the bookwork/paperwork that goes along with graduate studies. *SIGH*

So, as it happens, now starts the interlude for me to do all of the not fun but completely required work that I have to focus myself completely on - something I have only been juggling and not completely focused on. Consider this the big FYI that the blogging is going to stop a bit (at least until next week) and I'm going to do stuff related to the art that is teaching and not the teaching that is of art.

Life as an art student | Day 17 of 20

Weird start to the day and week (the last one for this class - boo!) as this area was hit in a seriously bad way by all of those storms that hit the huge chunk of the mid Atlantic coast. I was blessed enough to lose power no longer than 24 hours but had a place (my parents' house) to stay in that had electricity, wifi and central air. Others in my area have not been so fortunate and are sitting at day three without any of the aforementioned. It has been projected that many of them might not even have power until this coming weekend! No bueno especially with regard to the record breaking temperature highs this time of year.

Anyway, all of this had me completely unsure if I would even have painting class. This last week was going to be focused on more landscape work created en plein air like last week because (with the 4th being no class) we only really have two days to paint since the last day (on Thursday) we are going to do a bit of a presentation of each of our collectives of work. Well, when I went to the picnic grove on campus where we have been working, I found the place looking pretty much like a war zone. Trees done, metal picnic tables damaged beyond repair, and nobody in my class (including my professor) there. I started emailing my professor and he eventually showed up to look at the damage and then made the executive decision to just go to the studio classroom. Thus, it was decided that we would do self-portraits after all. So, that's what we did today.

We started it all with a big discussion about what the expectation was for our output and then talked about how we get to that point. Today's working goal was to do a straight line drawing in charcoal of ourselves on paper with a focus on only the planes of the face.

Tomorrow we are supposed to be able to get right into painting. I am really jazzed to paint vs. do charcoal work and I am finally going to get to use the canvas I stretched on the second day of class.

Life as an art student | Day 15 & 16 of 20

Don't have very much to show of yesterday other than how I finished...

Yes. It's very dark and (in all honesty) I took a LOT of artistic license because the tree looked pretty much nothing like that. The goal was to focus on the larger forms of the tree though and also learn how to use the tool that is omission when making decisions during the creative process when painting. As far as that goes, I did both of those items and so I feel like this is a successful painting. I definitely took an abstract approach - and that is something I have REALLY been trying to avoid as much as possible but I'm learning to accept that that approach isn't just OK but it's also necessary sometimes.

The funny thing about this one is that while I feel like it might be my most successful piece from this week, nobody else in my class liked it other than the professor and the two advanced painting students. The other beginning painters (like me) kept offering suggestions that maybe if I painted the leaves more individually or striped in grass then it would be "better." Kind of amusing to me that despite the fact that I said what my goals were, they still insisted I make it look more like what someone thinks a tree looks like versus what it might really look like. So, there's that. Oh well.

And then today this is what I did...

I moved spots and fell in love with this particular place that allowed for me to use more than just greens, yellows, and browns. I happened to have a whole bunch of small canvases in my studio and so I grabbed a bunch because my professor suggested it would help me with my one personal goal to stop painting everything larger so much that it doesn't fit on the canvas. I am so delighted to report that working this smaller size has been so helpful for me to think more carefully about proportions and scale. I would say the canvas is probably about a 5x7. (I don't remember and don't feel like going to measure it. Sorry.)

Because my canvases are/were so small, I was able to knock out not just one but TWO pieces today and for my next one I simply swiveled counterclockwise where there was a great view of a blue shed against some trees and houses.

For this one I used an even smaller canvas. I think it might have been 3x5 but (again) I don't know and don't feel like measuring it to give you exact info. It worked up really fast because of how small it was and gave me a huge boost of confidence that maybe I can paint enough to hold my own. I tried to take a picture of the canvas by itself but it's actually so small that my camera phone wouldn't let me so here is a shot of it with my other finished piece from today.

Next week there are only two days left for painting and while we were going to be assigned to do self-portraits, the professor has changed his mind and decided to allow us those days to continue doing landscapes. I'll be honest, I have never been a fan of landscapes or doing any kind of art en plein air but I am getting it now and I am absolutely loving it.  That being said, I am thrilled to have two more days to do some more tiny paintings that can eventually all be hung together somewhere in my house. I have some larger canvases that I could definitely dig into but I don't know. I'm loving the small canvases so much that I think I might just stick with them for the remainder of the class.

Our last class (next Thursday) will be spent doing a little bit of critiquing amongst ourselves that also will require each of us to present all of our work and explain it - basically, we are expected to make artist statements.

Life as an art student | Days 13 & 14 of 20

I could have posted yesterday but I didn't because I was feeling pretty lackluster about what I did. It was the first day of landscape paintings en plein air and I actually did tree studies in pencil rather than in paint. I guess I did OK (for the most part) but I started the day on the note of, "I feel like I've lost my mojo..." and I pretty much finished like that. While I tried to focus all I could think about was how I would rather be at home cleaning up the mess that is my house or how much the dog needed shampooed. *shrug* Well, here is what I did with a nod to the linear progression of the day's work.

So, yeah. I finished the day on an unfinished tree study. The professor insisted that the last one would be the stronger study to focus on and further develop into a painting on day 14 but I kind of rebuffed his suggestions and stubbornly insisted on doing just the one tree.


Today was day 14 and I did my best to do something different even though I was working at the same spot as yesterday. I ate breakfast (didn't do that yesterday) and I even took some quiet time before I got started to read scripture and just take in and connect with the space I was in. I felt tremendously better once I got started and even found myself humming some of my favorite hymns while I worked. Here are some snaps of the progression I made today and where I finished. 

Perhaps it is sacrilege but I scraped my canvas clean and rubbed it down with turpenoid to finish my day. Yes -  I did make some decent progress today but mostly? It was me just riding the learning curve and not me working to make any kind of masterpiece. Scrapping down my canvas is so liberating and it only fills me with confidence and enthusiasm to get to work tomorrow. The stained canvas is a good reminder (to me) that I'm not starting from a completely blank slate and it almost reminds me of a well-seasoned cast iron pan (or sorts).

Tomorrow I'm continuing with the tree study and I am thinking I am going to stick with the tree that I have been working on. I feel like the longer I look at it, study it, and paint it - the better I will know it's forms, values, and colors. I would much better do one really well done piece than a couple that are nothing other than "done."

Life as an art student | Days 11 & 12 of 20

The last few days have held my lowest lows and highest highs of my art studies so far.

Yesterday we had a discussion in class but I can't even remember about what. Why? Probably because it was such a bad day at the easel for me and I have blocked it from my memory.

While that sounds like a gross and dramatic exaggeration, it isn't. I ended up scraping my canvas at least half a dozen times in order to start over. I was using MASSIVE amounts of paint and pretty much just making a mess. My work was getting overly impressionistic (in relation to what I was actually going for which was more realistic) and despite the professor's best efforts to help support, encourage, and steer me, I wasn't making any reasonable gains.

In the midst of my painting, my professor actually stopped me and took me and my very wet canvas into the art gallery to see it in better light in an effort to help me to look at it in a different way. (Below is one of the versions I painted but scrapped)

 

He started trying to discuss what I had done so far and I just sat there not budging with my own perspective/opinion that I am largely failing with my efforts. I explained to him that I wasn't taking this class in order to do the same kind of painting I have always done - that is very impasto and impressionistic and mostly yielding things that could be considered "interesting" but is pretty much abstract in quality. He was very receptive to my ranting and proposed aspirations to learn to paint more realistically, proportionally, and accurate to what I am actually seeing versus what I see in my own mind when I look at something. 

At the end of class I scrapped my canvas once again and then three orange lines over my dirty canvas. Why? Because who cares? That was seriously my thinking. 

 

As we were all packing up to leave for the day the professor reminded us all of the homework assignment that he had given two nights ago that was due today in class. I inwardly groaned about it because it is my least favorite type of assignment that I've done over and over again in previous art courses. What was it? Doing a master copy of a line drawing but doing it when it's oriented upside down. 

Now, while I fully acknowledge that doing master copies from upside down subject matter is very instrumental with learning how to see and then draw more accurately, I hate doing it just the same. Pretty much I strongly dislike drawing across the board. Why? Because it's too flat for me. I mean, I know that it's a very important skill to possess in art but I just don't like it much. That being said, last night I begrudgingly did the assignment. I spent not even close to an hour at the very last minute right before I went to bed. Here is what I did in the right side up orientation. The original is on the left and my master copy version is on the right.

 I did OK, I think. Major issues include the fact that a enlarged it so much I couldn't fit a quarter of the drawing on my paper. (I have this issue with always enlarging things *shrug* and apparently it's the opposite problem than what most people have since typically they draw things smaller. I'm backwards. Go figure.) Anyway, I was satisfied enough that I went to bed and turned it in this morning at the start of class. We had more discussions about what the exercises was intended to help us accomplish and I did acknowledge that it did help me feel a little more confident that I could (to a certain degree) recreate what I do see and that I therefore do have a connection between my head and my hand so I wasn't a total loss.

When we got into the studio the professor did about a 30 minute demo to show another approach/technique to lay out and block a painting. When I was watching him it was like a light bulb went on in my mind with the realization of what I SHOULD be doing. He suggested a way where you lay out the forms and lines of the painting from the top down to the bottom and then from the background to the foreground. Kind of hard to explain but it made complete sense and was totally counter-intuitive to what I have (always) been doing. 

When we wrapped up with the demo I was completely motivated to try out his suggestions. I tried to scrap my canvas down but ended up slicing a hole in it. Luckily I had another spare one - that was dirty but still - handy and I used that instead. I did my best to wipe it down with turpenoid to get rid of what had been on there and ended up with having it lightly washed in colors from my previous painting. Despite the fact that it would have been more desirable to have a clean canvas I was actually OK with this.

When I finally got started using the method the professor suggested in his demo, I found (for lack of better word) my "mojo" in a way I never have even had when painting. It was AMAZING!!! Here is what I was able to lay out with the professor's suggested strategies.

When he stopped by my easel to check on me he was obviously delighted with my progress and even took it off my easel to show the rest of the class. I kind of didn't care about that and just wanted him to give it back to me so I could keep going with things. He gave me the go ahead to start laying in the color and while I was intimidated with the idea of it, I went with it and tried not to be too critical of myself and the mistakes I expected to make. The first image is when I first started laying the color into the forms and the second is where I had to stop for the day and call it finished.

I wish I had more time to work on it and develop further but I feel like I made so much progress today that I don't even care of the painting looks underdeveloped or not done. I am not touching it anymore because 1) I am just fine with it being in this state and 2) this was the last day with the model and the professor has pushed us to adhere to the rule to NOT paint anything unless the model is actually in front of us.

Next week we are doing landscape painting en plein air. I have never been a fan of landscape painting or doing work en plein air but after this week with doing this type of painting/work - also a kind of painting that I wasn't keen on getting into but now I feel like I have conquered (relatively speaking), I am very excited for what we are doing next week.

Life as an art student | Day 10 of 20

Today was our second day working with the model. We did a short discussion to kick things off and discussed both the work of Degas as well as the art form that is portraiture and I am finally feeling like I am getting the hang of the skill that is "reading" a painting. I'm sure I am going to have plenty more opportunity to practice and sharpen this (with all of the class discussions that are still yet to be had) but I am already pretty excited to share this with my students when school is back in session.

Rather than returning to the mess that was my canvas from yesterday, I brought in a fresh one for today. I have a huge inventory of Blick brand academic-grade 16x20s from my painting party biz so I just grabbed one of those before heading to class this morning.

Other things I did to help shape up today to be better included the following: had a good solid helping of a caffeinated beverage before I started painting, snacked heavy on proteins throughout my painting time, and took some tylenol because I've been dealing with feeling icky and I feel like that has hugely affected my performance (or lack thereof) this week. I didn't want to waste another day in the studio so I really made a point to do something different today in order to yield something different and I am happy to say that (for the most part) it worked out...

Underpainting

Midway break after the second 20-minute chunk of time with the model

Everything was going pretty well (as much as could be) and then I started running out of liquin. While I'm sure it's possible to paint without liquin, I am just beginning with this whole business of painting with oils (as in, I have less than two days in the studio with it) so improvising at this stage is just not so easily done. As it happened though, I still had at least an hour and a half left of studio time and so I ran to the bookstore to see if they had any. (They didn't.) So... I just made do, worked as much as I could as the paint stiffened against my brush and ended up ending on a completely "impressionistic" note.

Eh... I am OK with it. I mean, I don't hate it. I also don't love it or like it so much either. Why? Because it's pretty much the same thing that I have always done with acrylics. Perhaps this is just my style? (That being impressionistic) I don't know. I just know that I want to do something different and new and I want to refine the skillset (I have already) that I honestly feel like needs some serious polish. That's what I'm taking this class for in the first place! I'm trying to be better - DO better!!

Well, tomorrow IS another day and because I (again) am not trying to lose any more time in the studio with the model (we only have the last two days of this week with her) - I hauled myself to Utrecht downtown because I knew they were the only ones (locally) that would sell the largest bottle of Liquin my budget can afford currently. We'll see what tomorrow brings.